I posted about baby C’s sleep training and how he started sleeping from about 6:30pm to 5:30 or so am; J and I were so proud and thought, “okay we did it, we sleep trained, all done!” C slept through the night for about 11 hours uninterrupted each night for about 2 weeks. Then, he started waking in the middle of the night again. I went right to him to comfort him each time and before we knew it, we had regressed a bit. I was teaching him that I would run right in, instead of giving him a chance to practice his new skill. Oops! Before we knew it, there were challenges at bedtime, in the middle of the night, and early in the morning.
It took me about 2 weeks to acknowledge this, and I felt bad for how much I must have been confusing him. Bedtime had improved and while he still cried when I left the room, it usually was for 10 minutes and then I would check on him and he would fall asleep after that. Then all of a sudden one of our bedtimes involved 3 hours of crying on and off. I now see that not all babies are unicorns like A and that some might need more practice and that sleep learning is really an ongoing process. I know baby C will not cry at bedtime at some point, and that he will learn to fall asleep on his own in the middle of the night again, so here was my plan (at 16 weeks) to help him practice these skills as best I can:
Nights:
- Put in crib after bedtime routine with pacifier
- If crying starts, wait 10 minutes and replace pacifier
- If crying continues, wait 15 minutes and replace pacifier
- If crying continues, wait 20 minutes, go in and replace pacifier
- Repeat this process for any night wakings until 6:15am
- **remind yourself, you are teaching him an incredibly valuable life skill. If you start picking up/rocking/bringing to bed (unless sick or something wrong), you are not giving him a chance to practice or learn, and you are just going to confuse your little guy
(Note: I talked to the sleep consultant again and she really recommended starting with the 20 minute wait time, so a few nights in I listened to her 🙂 )
So I was prepared going forward with my plan in hand – here’s how it went:
Day 1: Bedtime was at 6:30pm – cried for 10 minutes, one check, then slept until 5:55am. Cried for 10 minutes, did a check and turned on mobile at 6:05am – no crying after that, out of crib 6:25am 🙂 A successful night!
Day 2: Bedtime was at 6:30pm. C fell asleep all by himself, with no crying, for the first time ever! But…woke up at 2:25am. I waited 10 minutes, checked and gave pacifier. Started crying again; I waited 15 minutes, checked and gave pacifier. Fell asleep until 3:30am and woke again. Waited 10 minutes, checked, waited 15 minutes checked, set timer for 20 minutes but at 18 minutes….he fell asleep on his own until morning. Baby C fell asleep on his own twice, he is learning! It was a hard night and I didn’t sleep much and felt awful the whole time, but counted my blessings for the health and safety we had while J was out of town. Talked to sleep consultant and she said that waiting 10 minutes is interrupting C more than helping him…
Day 3: Bedtime was at 6:30pm. He started crying shortly after I left the room – more of a fussing/crying. I set my timer for 20 minutes this time…at 18 minutes I went upstairs to get A’s bath ready and heard…silence. I peeked in and he stopped crying, looked around for a bit, and then closed his eyes and fell asleep…..until 6:30am! That is the latest he has ever slept in by himself, and he woke up all smiles.
Day 4: No crying at bedtime! Woke at 4:30am…2 rounds of 20 minutes of crying 😦 then asleep until morning.
Day 5: 10 minutes of crying at bedtime, fell asleep on his own. Woke up at 12:30am, cried for 20 minutes, fell asleep right after I went in to check on him and slept until morning.
Day 6: No crying at bedtime! No middle of the night wakings until almost 6am!
Day 7: 20 minutes of crying at bedtime 😦 Checked on him and he fell asleep right afterwards. Slept until morning time!
So 4 out of 7 nights there were no night wakings at all. 3 out of 7 nights there was no crying at bedtime. Our progress is going slowly, but it is there!
Day 8: 10 minutes of crying at bedtime, fell asleep on his own before check. Slept all night until 5am! 2 rounds of 20 minutes before checks, fell asleep for a while longer, turned mobile on and got up for the day at 6:30am.
Day 9: 5 minutes of crying at bedtime, fell asleep on his own. Slept all night until 6am!!! Woke up and didn’t cry!!! Talked to himself until 6:15, then I turned on his mobile until 6:30am.
Day 10: No crying at bedtime! Slept until 4:50am…cried 20 minutes, gave pacifier, fell back asleep until 6am – turned on mobile and he played until 6:30am.
Day 11: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 12: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 13: 20 minutes crying at bedtime, check, fell right asleep. No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 14: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
So in week 2, 5 out of 7 nights no night wakings (an improvement from last week). 4 out of 7 nights no crying at bedtime (an improvement from last week).
Day 15: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 16: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 17: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 18: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 19: No crying at bedtime! Night wakings at 3, 4, and 5:30…what the heck? I think he did not get enough milk during the day 😦
Day 20: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 21:No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
In week 3, 7 out of 7 nights there was no crying at bedtime!!! 6 out of 7 nights there were no night wakings! An improvement again in both areas from the week before.
Day 22: No crying at bedtime! Night wakings at 3 and 5…fell back asleep from 6 to 6:45am.
Day 23: Started crying at bedtime and was refusing parts of bottles during the day…offered 3 more ounces and he fell right asleep. No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 24: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 25: Started crying at bedtime, fell right asleep after 2 more ounces. No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 26: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 27: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
Day 28: No crying at bedtime! No night wakings! No crying in the morning and slept in past 6!
5 out of 7 nights no crying at bedtime, and 6 out of 7 nights no night wakings.
We are all sleeping so great now and getting the rest we need 🙂
Mama Re-Organized 